"Nothing is Reality. Reality is Nothing."

We are born dreamers and the irony is that we keep denying this reality. I have nurtured so many dreams deep within me that now it becomes to fathom them. Long ago I learnt a French word called 'ennui'. The word can be loosely translated as 'boredom' in English. But I knew that it has deeper implication and I felt what the deeper implication is for months in my own city-Kolkata. Out of love,out of friendship,out of the things you love- I have experienced it all. And every time my heart yearned for an escape route. Yes, I am an escapist - I choose the easier way out than choosing the more difficult part. For months I have longed to be on a different land. But I never knew that I would get that escape route at a time when I was least expecting it. Lennon was right - "Life is what happens to you when you are busy making other plans". My plans were different,but I do not know when all of a sudden a moment came and everything changed for me. I said we are born dreamers, but I never knew that my long lost dream of sharing my life with someone would come true. I am perhaps one of those few people who are blessed because in spite of been away from home I have never felt the absence of home. And in no time I found my life in a city which is completely alien to me:Never knew that a person's presence can be so fulfilling in itself that you can find your family in that one person.May be this was that suppressed quest within me that has finally managed to find its lost path. You can long to be a wanderer all your life but wanderers are alone, loner and always in search of that 'something'. At different stages of my life I have found a different definition of that 'something'. And if I could pen down each of those definitions, I would have realized how much I have evolved as a person. One thing I have known about myself that I am a confused soul. My cynicism and pessimism has slowly and steadily added to this nature of mine. And whoever would read this write up would think "Why the hell this person digress so much?" But how far sorted are we in real life? The moment we think that this is how our life should be, that very moment we get to experience something that totally redefines our lives. May be this is the reason why I let me pen flow the way my thoughts flow. I do not want to govern my thoughts, tame them or sort them. I let them flow and frolic in their own world and every time I pay a visit to that world, I get disillusioned. What did I actually write? I just realized about the ambiguity and nothingness that life is all about. By: Deepabali Chakrabarti---