It was all over yesterday evening but heart is such a mean machine which runs on hope.Albeit I got my teddy but this was not I wanted or longed for but I could hardly speak anything before her.After few minutes she was lost from my eye sight but not from my heart.I was feeling weak but reassured myself that this earth is almost round and we are going to meet again. I kept myself busy throughout trying not to remember and somehow I conquered over her thoughts because I equate time with money these days.I slept quite late last night thinking of fate which is quite elusive in relationships.
I got up late today and I opened my cup board and saw japanese yen lying over there.For a moment I was freezed and all her talks came gushing before my eyes.why she did this to me. The law of comparative analysis in me was back in action thinking all the complexities of relationships but I was unable to draw any conclusion about it.I felt little sad the way she turned out in the last,this was not I expected ever.I even thought that why I always find people(esp.woman) who lead miserable life or have some sad past or sometimes present as well.Is it because I easily connect with them or do they find solace in me.I don't know whether she would ever read this piece of emotional shit or not but I feel confused whether I wanted her more or she needed me badly. What made her to come so close to me.Neither I have time nor money to splurge.Its just that I am following my dream and living with it. A lots of question bothering me now but I donot have any regrets because I havenot pretended anything before her.
We excahnged almost hudred text everyday but I havenot received any since las night.I hope she is fine wherever she is. Afterall almsot everything was unconditional.I don't know if ever I am stumbling in the darkness and found her then how am I going to react to that situation.
Fianally its all over again.
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