Reality is harsher than a nightmare: Coming to terms with my second life.

Last Friday was really bad because I doubted myself and it’s been really painful since than. Though I try to keep my calm and pretend that I am fine but deep within I feel the lingering pain of silence which is killing me every moment. I am not able to concentrate in anything. I have kept myself busy since Friday but it’s just a sham because my alter ego or my extended reflection is still not responding to me.
My only possession is my alter ego which gave me the second life, which acts as my sixth sense during the time of crisis or when I am in deep waters. I laugh with it,cry with it. My whole world revolves around it. Whatever I do whether in my conscious or in sub conscious , wherever I go it has always been with me. I am really feeling lifeless though I am doing everything for the heck of doing but I feel as a complete looser. Everything is slipping out of my hand and I am just the mute spectator.

I want to redeem now and I am trying all possible ways to get my extended reflection back in sync as it’s very difficult to live without it. My only possession is my alter ego which gave me the second life, which acts as my sixth sense during the time of crisis or when I am in deep waters. God please help me! I feel that I have stabbed my own belief on Friday. Please bring it back. I swear that I will obliterate this word. I want my reflection again otherwise my existence is meaningless.
Lovelorn.